Chibs Be The Worst

 

They fucked it up, did Pip and Jane: 

They didn’t mean to be such bores,

But couldn’t help including lots

Of running round in corridors.

But they were fucked up in their turn

By Terrance Dicks and Robert Holmes,

Whose Timelord tales, while quite routine,

Were written better, like good poems.

Now Chibs hands back to Russell T

A show that he’s made so much worse. 

Boring, silly and clichéd:

Like ripping off This Be The Verse. 

 It's like an astrolabe, a kabbalah,

like the Doctor Who titles, it's 

like the test card, it's like an

Etch-a-Sketch, oscilloscope, 

collide, it's like, it's 

Crosshairs

Turn your wrathful gazes

 

Turn your wrathful gazes

They tell you refugees come here because it’s a land of milk and honey

Then they say no help for you because they got no fucking money

Now if you take one look around the City, you can see that isn’t true

So tell me why the fuck you let them mug you off that the first bit’s true?

They come here because they’ve got no choice,

no matter how the BBC ventriloquize

Sue-Ellen’s voice deep down you know

that’s true, don’t let them lie to you

one moment more, take the crisis to their

door, turn your wrathful gazes to

the City from the Shore!

Extremely Unbalanced Clerihew written after listening to Death Grips

Harry  likes playing dress-up too. 

 

If Ice-T, who sang 'Cop Killer',

were to shoot a man who calls himself Harry Miller

who runs a group of terverts called 'We Are Fair Cop',

it wouldn't actually be ironic because despite the name he uses for his group and the fact he constantly trades on being 'an ex-policeman' Miller never in fact completed police training, 

imagine being too much of a nonce to get a job 

at the Pork Shop. 

Ghostwatch

 

Bad trips tattooed on the unconscious

of Old England. Belfast black magic

and the ghosts of Roundhay Park.

An akasic detonation at the home

of Hangman Hawley: the ensuing

conflagration throwing spectres

on the dark. Do what you like, is how

he'd gloss the words above the doorway

for the bits of rough from boys' homes

he'd have piped up to his door.

In a country with amnesia we do duty

as Remembrancers: the things that we 

remember teach us why we fight the war. 

Hat tips to: The Indelicates, Patrick Keiller, Programmed to Chill's Ghostwatch episode

Angel's Lament

The loneliness is what destroys.

The need to stay just paranoid

enough to not be taken by surprise.

The weighing up of alibis: 

are those two actually mates,

or colleagues who corroborate?

As questioning's a constant curse,

the confirmation can be worse:

the loss of those you must cut ties with

when you learn who they got high with,

and the ones who have to die

for what they did when they were high. 

Crossing the Channel in a Positive Light

The Last of England, Ford Madox Brown

Small boats crossing the Channel are great,

not just because they make Sue-Ellen irate:

they reunite families, get folk out of danger;

crammed into a dinghy, no-one is a stranger, 

like Londoners cramming the Tube in the Blitz,

they're united in braving the waves and the winds;

like Jesus' disciples in days long ago,

they have often sold all worldly goods that they own

and endured the contempt of both soldier and thief

in the hope of obtaining some measure of peace,

release from a grief inexorably sealed.

They risk all for deliverance unquaranteed,

walking for miles with ambivalent guides

(if they're lucky) to show them the gaps in the wires,

risking violence of every unspeakable kind

in the hope that in some land like ours they'll find

the freedom to live as whoever they are.

No-one crosses an ocean to get a free car.

People come here because they still think we are free:

they don't know that our government censors our speech

by forbidding the hosting of video posts

which 'glorify' crossing the Channel in boats. 

Well, Sue-Ellen, I'll tell you this right to your face:

I think crossing the Channel in small boats is ace.